Congratulations to all phobia victims

In case you’ve forgotten that today marks an important occasion, here’s my political idol Jeremy Corbyn to remind you:

“Today – on International Day against Homophobia, Biphobia and Transphobia – we recommit to resisting hatred experienced by so many LGBT+ people around the world, whether it’s bullying, abuse or violent oppression. Labour will continue fighting for equality for all.”

Lest you might fear that Jeremy and his jolly friends are solely committed to supporting the rights of sexual deviants (I use this word in a non-judgemental way, simply to denote a numerical deviation from the norm), rest assured this isn’t so.

Labour in general and Jeremy specifically are equally passionate about the rights of every racial and religious minority, except naturally the Jews. Jeremy may not believe in Christ, but he certainly detests Jews.

You may detect a certain logical incongruity there, but none exists. Jeremy has no quarrel with the Jews’ rejection of Christianity. He rejects it himself, so no problem there. The problem is that Jeremy’s inspiration, Karl Marx, equated the Jew with the capitalist, and so does Jeremy.

Now virulent hatred of capitalists (meaning people unlikely to vote for Jeremy) – and hence, vicariously, Jews – isn’t to be resisted at all. Quite the contrary: it must be encouraged.

One detects a potential conflict to be caused by Jews who also happen to be homo-, bi- or transsexual, but trust Jeremy to find his way around it. That’s where Marxist dialectics comes in handy.

Thesis: Jews are bad. Antithesis: sexual perversions are good. Synthesis: long live the revolution! Who can fault this logic? Certainly no Labour person, c. 2019.

But Jews apart, it’s good to know that Jeremy is committed to resisting the bullying, abuse and violent oppression suffered by practitioners of minority sexuality and also by Muslims, especially those who belong to Hamas and Hezbollah.

Underneath it all one detects – or rather hopes to detect – a smouldering affection for all persecuted minorities, except the Jews. Well, actually not just them.

I’m still waiting for Jeremy to issue an equally robust statement supporting a group that, according to the report commissioned by Foreign Secretary Hunt, provides “the overwhelming majority of persecuted religious believers”.

In fact, 80 per cent of people facing religious persecution around the world are –  Christians. Yes, I know that Jeremy isn’t one of them, but then neither is he a homo-, bi- or transsexual. However, this doesn’t prevent him from sticking up for those people in a principled, disinterested way.

How about it, Jeremy? By all means, do continue the steady flow of messages expressing love and support of Hamas and LGBT+ folk. By all means, use Marxist dialectics to solve the dichotomy of Hamas tending to kill LGBT+ folk in all sorts of imaginative ways.

But interspersed with those protestations of love, how about just the odd expression of sympathy with Christians brutally persecuted around the world? Yes? No, I suppose not.

Using the inimitable linguistic trick Jeremy performs with nothing short of virtuosity, one may say that he must suffer from a bad case of Christophobia. That, however, won’t stop anyone from voting for him in the next general election – as long as Jeremy is unwavering in his love of everyone who hates the West and rejects all its moral, religious and political certitudes.

Oh well, enough of such bilious musings on this festive occasion. Happy International Day against Homophobia, Biphobia and Transphobia, everyone! Many happy returns and all that.